From the home office in Ottawa, Ontario, here it the top ten list of good uses for Duct Tape on Moonbase Alpha.

By John Fleming



10. You can fix what's wrong with Main Mission, if we can find the problem. Hell, tape everything!

9. Patch the hole in Victor's space suit *before* he goes out to play.

8. Maybe fix some of those Eagles that Alan keeps crashing.

7. Stop air leaks in the windows every time Collins throws himself against one.

6. Secure patients to their beds so they can't situp and scream, and then cause havoc on the base.

5. Securely attach the monster's heads so they don't flop around during a fight scene.

4. After wearing the same clothes for over 5 years, we can cut them up into little pieces and make a new outfit everyday.

3. Tape our mouths shut when Tony makes a new batch of beer.

2. May finally stop Helena from screaming.

And the number one use for Duct Tape on Moon Base Alpha...

1. With enough of it, we can tape ourselves to a planetary orbit and stop this infernal wondering the Galaxy thing.